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Armed and Outrageous, Cozy Mystery (Book 1) (An Agnes Barton Senior Sleuths Mystery), by Madison Johns

Completely revised and re-edited March 2, 2014
Armed and Outrageous is a USA Today Bestseller, October 17, 2013.
Also check out the Agnes Barton Paranormal series, same characters, different spin.

Hilarious Senior sleuths — Grandma Mazur meets Murder She Wrote — cozy mystery.

Agnes Barton is not your typical senior citizen living in Tadium, MI, on the shores of Lake Huron. She drives a red hot Mustang, shops at Victoria's Secret, rankles local police officials, and has a knack for sticking her nose where it doesn't belong.

What does a murder that happened forty-three years ago have to do with missing tourist Jennifer Martin? Agnes makes it her personal mission to find out, and she's not letting the fact she's seventy-two get in the way. Butting heads with Sheriff Clem Peterson is something she's accustomed to, but lately Clem seems to be acting even more strange, making Agnes wonder what he may be hiding ala the Martin disappearance.

Agnes’ partner in crime, Eleanor Mason tags along, Watson to her Holmes.
Together, they unearth clues. If only Eleanor would behave, as although lovable, she has a knack for getting into trouble by tangling with her rival, Dorothy Alton, or flirting with anyone—male or female—and gossiping! She's incorrigible, but she does carry a Pink Lady revolver in her purse, one that has proved useful at times.

Life for Agnes and Eleanor is shaken up when Agnes' former boss and secret crush comes to Tadium. Before long, the lady sleuths have more on their hands to contend with as goons roll into town and bullets begin to fly.

Adult content.

Also by Madison Johns

Agnes Barton Senior Sleuths Mystery Series in order:
Armed and Outrageous (Book one)
Grannies, Guns and Ghosts (Book two)
Senior Snoops (Book three)
Trouble in Tawas (Book four)
Treasure in Tawas (Book five)

Agnes Barton/Kimberly Steele Cozy Mystery Series
Pretty, Hip & Dead (Book one)

A Cajun Cooking Mystery series
Target of Death (Book one)

Romance
Pretty and Pregnant (Kimberly Steele novella)
Redneck Romance (Kelly Gray, standalone)

http://madisonjohns.com
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  • Published on: 2014-01-11
  • Released on: 2014-01-11
  • Format: Kindle eBook

About the Author
Madison Johns spent most of her childhood locked inside her head. She preferred to distance herself from other children her age, and had been described as a dreamer. Even as a small child, she remembers staying awake many a night fighting dragons, whisked away to foreign lands, or meeting the man of her dreams, if only in her head. Her caring nature led her to the healthcare field where she was employed as a nursing care assistant at a nursing home, and it was there that she was inspired to write her first cozy mystery, Armed and Outrageous.

Most helpful customer reviews

159 of 164 people found the following review helpful.
Sorry
By R. Jones
I gave up one-third of the way through. I enjoyed some of the humor in the first chapter, but the repetitive beat of bodily function and sex drivel from the geriatric duo of Agnes and Eleanor became boring. It was like reading a joke book in one sitting. The first ones are good, but by the tenth page, the humor seems tired. My greatest gripe, however, is with the poor proof reading. I believe there's nothing wrong or bad about not being a perfect speller or have great command of grammar, but I become totally upset when authors won't seek the help of someone who is proficient in these areas to proof the work. There are plenty of English teachers who would be happy to do the work for a reasonable price, or perhaps for a note of appreciation in the book itself.

365 of 388 people found the following review helpful.
Total Disappointment
By Susan San Filippo
I was hooked when I read the comparison of this book to Miss Marple. No way! The plot is ridiculous, the characters are totally unrealistic, and I hated the gratuitous insertion of sex, sex toys, sexy lingerie, physical violence between senior women ( really?), and poor story telling. For example, the main character is shot at several times and her house is destroyed by a fire bomb and she finally (finally!) decides someone is trying to kill her, but she worries about the mice in the house dying in the fire. She goes to a sex store and buys a vibrator that she proceeds to keep in her purse and drop in front of everyone time and time again. She gets drunk and wakes up the next morning with a man. There is a disgusting oral sex scene. The illegal drug use in the book was also totally obnoxious. The seniors sell hash laced brownies as a fund raiser and everyone in town knows about it and partakes. No. This book could have been enjoyable but it was not. It was offensive.

73 of 75 people found the following review helpful.
tried too hard
By Kindle Customer
The premise was interesting; a littl' ol' lady solving mysteries--like a modern Miss Marple, perhaps? As a littl' ol' lady myself, I thought, "this could be fun!" However...it wasn't. The author was so obsessed with adding sex to her story, at least in the almost constant comments that the characters made to each other, that the plot took second place. I couldn't even make it half way thru the book. I am sorry I wasted my money on this one.

See all 1210 customer reviews...

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